During the last 6 weeks of my mom's pregnancy, I decided that her left hip bone would be an awesome place to stuff my head into. It made sense I suppose. It wasn't time for me to come out yet and I was getting tired of just floating around with nowhere to rest my head, so why not shove it in a tiny space?
Turns out that I had missed the memo about baby's heads being soft and pliable. So when my time came to do my grand entrance into the world, it is no surprise (at least to anyone else but me) that my first nick name would be "Gumby". Yes. Gumby, the lovable clay toy with the lopsided slanted head. Oh the horror! My mother was distraught that her otherwise perfect baby (hey I was a good looking baby) had a huge lump on her head exactly the shape of her hip bone.
The doctor consoled my mother saying that in time it should go away, if they rubbed it every day softly (yeah like a freakin' buddha belly) and gently massaged the bump. If that failed (I bet mom's confidence just shot through the roof at that statement), she shouldn't worry because I was a girl and my hair would grow and hide the bump. Seemed sketchy, and, they weren't counting on me being a bald baby the first year of my life. No hair. Thanks, doc.
Eventually the bump went away with the rubbing of the hands all over my head like a freakin' crystal ball. Also, I grew a fine head of hair which now covers other slight imperfections. However, it makes me wonder if maybe that's why Gumby was one of my favorite cartoons growing up. It also makes me wonder if that's why I'm so fond of hats, and I sort of feel exposed without one.
One thing is certain. This story makes for good conversation, maybe even makes me a nice centerpiece for a table. Next time ya'll see me, feel free to touch my head. I know you're already wondering inside your head or at least picturing me walking around a clay farm with Pokey by my side. Besides, I like having my head rubbed. Good times.
Food for thought: Would a pink colored bullet hurt you the same as a regular bullet? Or say an adamantium one? Anyone care to try?
Turns out that I had missed the memo about baby's heads being soft and pliable. So when my time came to do my grand entrance into the world, it is no surprise (at least to anyone else but me) that my first nick name would be "Gumby". Yes. Gumby, the lovable clay toy with the lopsided slanted head. Oh the horror! My mother was distraught that her otherwise perfect baby (hey I was a good looking baby) had a huge lump on her head exactly the shape of her hip bone.
The doctor consoled my mother saying that in time it should go away, if they rubbed it every day softly (yeah like a freakin' buddha belly) and gently massaged the bump. If that failed (I bet mom's confidence just shot through the roof at that statement), she shouldn't worry because I was a girl and my hair would grow and hide the bump. Seemed sketchy, and, they weren't counting on me being a bald baby the first year of my life. No hair. Thanks, doc.
Eventually the bump went away with the rubbing of the hands all over my head like a freakin' crystal ball. Also, I grew a fine head of hair which now covers other slight imperfections. However, it makes me wonder if maybe that's why Gumby was one of my favorite cartoons growing up. It also makes me wonder if that's why I'm so fond of hats, and I sort of feel exposed without one.
One thing is certain. This story makes for good conversation, maybe even makes me a nice centerpiece for a table. Next time ya'll see me, feel free to touch my head. I know you're already wondering inside your head or at least picturing me walking around a clay farm with Pokey by my side. Besides, I like having my head rubbed. Good times.
Food for thought: Would a pink colored bullet hurt you the same as a regular bullet? Or say an adamantium one? Anyone care to try?
No bullets. And hahahahahahaha awww Gumby! I do not believe i have ever asked to rub your head...what was it i asked? Hmmm.
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