It's okay to laugh at me. Go for it.

The first movie I remember watching and falling head over heels for one of the actors was "Stand By Me". No, not River Phoenix, though that would've been my taste in guys now that I'm older. I fell madly, insanely, obsessively in love with Corey Feldman. I was about...5 or 6 when I first saw it. I used to lay on the floor in our laundry room some days, and fall asleep on the laundry pile. I truly have no explanation other than I fancied myself a hobo as a child. Anyways, I'd dream of waking up on top of said laundry pile and above me Corey Feldman would be leaning down looking intently at my face. I'd see his messy hair, he was wearing a black shirt with a yellow Batman logo on it and his dog tag chain would be almost hitting my chest as he leaned in closer just looking into my eyes. He'd lick his lips, which is something he does repeatedly if you look at him in films or interviews, and I'd just think "He's such a pretty bad boy."

I moved from him to my Brad Renfo/Johnathan Brandis phase between the ages of 9 and 11. I used to watch every film ever made that so much as had a glimpse of Brad Renfro in it. The Client was an excellent film...The Adventures of Tom & Huck? Not so much. Sleepers, Apt Pupil and The Cure were my favorites with him. Sigh. Posters on my wall. Johnathan Brandis? I lost count how many times I watched his film with Chuck Norris "Sidekick". Gawd I thought he was just gorgeous and I felt like I could relate to him because he suffered asthma and well...I was a weezing lil thing too. Except he kicked ass and got to meet Chuck Norris and well, I still dropped to the floor coughing my lungs out after running from the couch to the fridge and back.

Who could forget my "husband when I grow up" phase with Brad Pitt. This lasted between ages...13 and um, well I'd still nibble his buttcheek if I could. It started with "Legends of the Fall" and sorta fizzled away with "Troy". The man was in my every daydream, his eyes...the way he cries, his jaw-line...his hair...mmm. Yeah! So! I used to have this little squee in delight because when I was about 11 my phone number ended in the digits 1331, which were the current ages of Brad Renfro and Brad Pitt respectively at the time. Laugh.

Now, I am about to confess to the world something that about...only 3 of you would know. You all poke fun at me and pick on me for this obssessive behavior. Yes. I am a Twihard. A what? A Twilight fan. No, I don't have Twilight merchandise from Hot Topic or posters on my wall. No, I do not in any shape or way approve of the crapfest adaptation of the book Hollywood pulled on us. Yes, I know, Stephenie Meyer's writing skills are that of a hormonal ape with too much access to emo music. I never claimed they were literature classics, no, not at all. But *I* love them. I will re-read them over and over. They mean something to me. Yes I bought the movie, yes I have the soundtrack (which is not at all bad! mucho indie music me likey!). But most of all, I am again having myself a celeb-crush on the 2 leading guys.

Sure I liked Rob Pattinson when he came out on Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire. I thought he was cute. Now I just wanna steal him and do mostly illegal things to him. No, I'm not a 'twihard' fan who would look at him and call him "Edward" or see him as a real damn vampire. Gimme a break! The man is gorgeous, in my eyes anyways. The few people that have witnessed me in a "Rob Pattinson" frenzie will know. I became obsessed with him, even going to Los Angeles on vacation and spending half my time with my eyes peeled in case he was in townThe other leading guy? Taylor Lautner?? I'm not even legally allowed to have the thoughts I have with him. The kid is 17 yrs old! Holy mother of Jebus, those are some awesome 17 yrs! The boy has this devilish grin and dimples. I will not discuss below the neck because, I dont wanna go to jail. But may I say...D-A-M-N.

So there you have it, with the second film for Twilight "New Moon" rapidly approaching (Nov. 20th but who's counting??), I guarantee you folks I will be just like the pimply pre-teens and their soccer moms squealing and giggling and screaming my little heart out when I see the previews and posters. Not because I'm obsessed with fictional characters...Oh no suh!

Yari here sees real life gentlemen. Screw Twilight. Gimme yummy cuties. Gimme gimme. I'm 12 again...and I'm THIS close to buying a TeenBop magazine solely to hang their posters on my wall. Sigh. MMM. Mmm. mmm. Laugh all you want, they better never cross paths with me. Rawr.