Haunting...

I was recently discussing paranormal experiences with a good Twitter friend and read some of his blog depicting experiences he had in the past with ghosts or spirits, when I unwillingly thought of the things I have seen myself in the past.

Now then, there are certain things I do not like talking about out loud due to personal beliefs/fears. Some of those have to do with spirits/ghosts/paranormal, and my encounters with it growing up. Half of me seriously is deathly afraid to speak it out loud and the other half knows you will all think I am insane or making it up.

However, I did promise him I would share it with him, since he shared his with the world. So, read, ponder, digest, whatever. Here it goes.

The earliest I remember is staying at my grandfather's house on my dad's side when I was about 3-4 yrs old. My grandfather had passed away when I was 2, however he had been a lifelong believer/practiced Santeria and some voodoo. This fact alone creeps me out to this very day. Anyways, the bedroom I slept in with my grandmother, still had all his saints and candles inside the closet and at that age, I really didn't understand why I hated being in that room alone. Every time I was alone in that room, from that early age until my grandmother moved out when I was 11, I saw a shadow of a man outside the window. I would tell my grandmother, but she'd just tell me to lay facing her and go back to sleep. It was this dreadful feeling in that room. I'd hear steps around the bed. I felt my name whispered in my ear and even the warm breath against my neck. I'd feel someone playing with my hair or a hand resting on my feet over the blankets. She had a radio that would turn on and off all night. Grandmother never seemed scared, just tired of it and just able to ignore it. Blah.

I also had things that started to happen in my bedroom at home around the time I was 7. I started having nightmares every night, like the one I blogged a few days ago. Toys would move without explanation. Again the name whispering in my ear, until one night when I was 9 and I saw a hand come up the side of my bed and start pulling on my blanket until it uncovered my arm. I was sure I was dreaming so I just felt my breathing go quicker and moved my arm...the hand grabbed my arm by the elbow and pinned it on the bed. I screamed my lungs out and dad came running in. He turned the light on and there was, of course, nothing there. But the sheet was crumpled just like I had seen the hand do it and there was no one that could make me sleep in there again. My parents ended up having to put a mattress in their room and I slept on the floor of their room until I was 11. I was formally kicked out back to my room, the nightmares continued. The whispers/shadows did not.

I've woken up with scratches on my back after dreaming with ... things. The latest I felt was when I was up in Boston visiting my sister Cathy. We were downtown, walking the Freedom Trail (...or the long ass walk that would never end) and we arrived at the old cemetery by The Common. We walked through the tombs and took pictures, but when I reached a corner of it, by some old OLD headstones...I started feeling nauseous. I desperately looked for Cathy and she was on the other side of the place so I sort of stood there kinda frozen. I felt a small hand tugging at my shirt and almost climbing up my back, wrapping it's arms around my neck. I could've sworn it was a little girl, about 5 yrs old. In my head I could feel her, see her on my back...but my eyes saw nothing. But I FELT HER. It was insane. She was telling me her feet were burning, that it was hot. She kept asking me to put water on her feet because they were burning. I got more dizzy, felt like I was choking and started walking out of that corner as fast as I could. By then Cathy was pulling me out of the cemetery as I was telling her what was going on. She told me to breathe and we sat down in The Common for a while. Eventually I couldn't feel her anymore, the farther I got away from those tombs. I couldn't explain it. I just wanted to cry. I felt so sad.

There's other things...but I don't want to go there. When you've grown up in a house where someone did devil worshiping...things happen you just don't want to remember.

Adieu.