Bugs and Battery Pulls

GAH!!! ACK!!!

It's that time of the year again, kiddos, when my day consists of running from Point A to Point B while covering my ears and neck, crying like a lunatic. I mean, you would think that after 6 years of living in this alternate universe called Odessa, I would be used to the 5-8 weeks of hell that swarm upon it every year, around this time.

It starts with a tiny grasshopper here, a slightly bigger one there. The next morning you wake up and over sized locusts, grasshoppers and crickets are covering pretty much any available surface. Creepy, HUGE, with wings some of them. I don't know how many times I've blogged it, tweeted it, told everyone I know. I don't do bugs. Not butterflies. Not ants. No bugs. I freak out. Entomophobia. Google that crap.

So for weeks, I walk with my eyes scanning every inch of earth around me. Often I find myself walking through small hallways where the walls are lined up with these giant winged devils just waiting for me to walk by to jump on me. I freak out and run. It has resulted in many a sprained ankle and in me sitting in my car for hours because there's a praying manthis on the outside of my window. Example of my fear? Why yes. Last night I was washing my hair, and happened to glance up at the bathroom ceiling. There was a moth on the other side of the restroom, very well away from the shower area. A moth. The size of a quarter.I couldn't concentrate on anything else but that moth for the next several minutes. So, it happened. It started crawling on the ceiling towards me. I knew it would do it, naturally. Where else would any insect gravitate towards other than the Yari that kept backing up against the shower wall...trying to melt into it and get away from the danger. It kept getting closer, and I lost all ability to finish washing my hair. A bit of shampoo fell in my eye and I desperately tried to let the water clear away the stinging, but was too panicked to close my eyes for too long with that thing there. Sure enough, Mr. Moth was halfway in his journey towards me.

I did what I've done all my life when confronted with a bug. I froze, and screamed out for my dad. Mom opened the bathroom door and stormed in, I think half-expecting me to be set on fire or attacked by Godzilla. "WHAT? ARE YOU OK?"..."Can you kill that moth and make sure it doesn't fall on me? Please?". She slammed the door, cussing me out for being too old for this nonsense. With the impact of the door slam, the moth fluttered around a bit and landed again, this time a foot away from me in the ceiling. I screamed and this time started whimpering. My hair full of shampoo, soaking wet and calling out for dad again. I felt mom open the door again, with a fly swatter and before I could tell her to do it slow so it wouldn't fall on me, she smashed the crap out of the moth and it fell on me. I slipped in the tub trying to run away from the dead moth, hitting my head on the soap rack. She called me stupid and just let me there...with a dead moth.

Yeah. A MOTH does that. Imagine me trying to maneuver through thousands of giant, jumpy-flying things. How I loathe mid-summer/early fall here.

Also! I have reached the end of my love/hate relationship with RIM. My first phone was a Blackberry Pearl back in 2005. I hated that little asshole. However, I used it until the OS updates would no longer make any difference in how poorly it worked with pushing my emails and suck. On top of that, the God-forsaken trackball. Stuck. I finally got frustrated and slammed it against my steering wheel to get it unstuck. Yeah. I hulk-smashed my phone to bits and made my way, happily, into a Bold. This lasted about .... 4 months until last November I switched to Verizon and got a Storm 2. What. A. Piece. Of. Fail. The clicking screen that was locked within a day of use. I...I just don't want to get into the whole story of how poorly made this phone was. OS updates did nothing for it. I've had about 4 replacements so far, and they keep wanting to send me new Storm 2's. My life has been a continuous battery pull with BlackBerry. So, on Thursday, this little piggy is driving her ass to the Verizon store and ordering a Droid X. Yes. I've gone droid.

It is my most sincere desire to have a phone that's reliable and sexy. Yes. After talking to my buddy Phil about Droid options, the word 'sexy phone' is now part of my daily vernacular.

I figured you guys deserved an update about what's been going on. The past few posts have been directed at people that have hurt me, mostly because I allowed them to. I think I'm healing. I hope.

New doors are opening, and I'm kind of peeking in before walking through them. I hope I don't get bamboozled anymore. I just typed the word bamboozled into spell check and it turns out it's a real word.

I'll be damned.

Limitless undying love, which

shines around me like a million suns,

It calls me on and on across the universe...