Howling

There's a show I just finished watching on the Spanish NATGEO channel titled "Human Pray", that has left me with a new view on a topic that has been a source of terror since my childhood:

Wolves.

I've blogged a few times about how wolves scare me and have been the main villains in a recurring nightmare I've had since I was 7 years old. I've also mentioned how, aside from scaring me, they are one of my favorite animals - after the llamas and seals.

When I was a kid, my father used to think it was funny to howl in the middle of the night until I'd be so scared, I'd be in tears begging him not to turn into a wolf. Funny pops, ha ha. Use the phobia as a joke. Sweet.

The show interviews this family with three sons that decided to go camping at a national park in Canada. They canoe up the river to a secluded part of the forest, about 3 hours from any civilization. After a day of fun and leaving their campground unattended, they make a fire and start cooking dinner. They hear a wolf howling in the distance, and they all join in and howl back. They hear the howls closer, but think nothing of it. In fact, it's such a gorgeous night, they decide against sleeping inside the tents, and opt for a night under the stars...

They put the 3 yr old between his older brothers, who are 11 and 9. The parents go a few dozen feet away, and everyone goes to sleep. Honky Dory. Naturally, in the middle of the night, the wolf found them. He literally was eating the 11 year old's face off, the kid didn't wake up until he felt he was being dragged away fast into the forest. Kid screams, parents fight off the wolf who kept coming back time and time again until they got the hint that A) the wolf was hungry and B) their son lost half his face and was bleeding to death. Canoe their happy asses 3 hours down the river, then 4 hour drive to hospital. Kid made it but is traumatized by wolves.

Ahem. This comforted me greatly. I now realize wolves can't hurt me. Ever. Here's why:

I will not ever camp in an area where wolves live.

I will not camp more than a few minutes from civilization. Screw Bear Gryllis.

My ass will not cook and leave food outside...even if I'm just surrounded by raccoons.

My ass will also sleep INSIDE a tent, with a big ass knife and a shotgun. In case the Zombie Apocalypse begins while I'm on vacation.

In general, I'll limit my wolf contact to nightmares, zoos and on the t.v. Even then, I probably wouldn't howl back.

I need sleep.